How has your life been different from what you imagined?
How, well that may take some time to explain you see when I first came to this world I thought it as a place of exploration, unending discovery and individual interconnectedness. What I found to my surprise is that it is a prison wrapped in a lined maze of misshapen puzzle entrances to a peaceful labyrinth pathway to a prison. Of course not being deterred the type to be I began to plan my escape.

Now a breakout from a prison like this sort is not easy, being so young I brought this to some people’s attention that I trusted, and well to my surprise they said they knew it was a prison. Yes, knew it was a prison, which at the time caught me quite off guard.
” For God’s sake” I said ” it’s a prison”

To which they replied “Yes, but we like it.”

” Like it?” I responded. ” It’s a prison.”

Of course this did not go over very well with those people who liked the prison and as a result put me under quite a bit of scrutiny. Scrutiny of everything I thought and did, eventually leading to being placed into a area of confinement. The confinement area being two fold, one, of intense education on the benefits of prison life and second, extended periods in solitary isolation. Which, when you are planning an elopement, can be advantageous to your escape, for there is nothing like some time in another person’s dark space to find light that shines on us all, and I have been in some oh so dark quiet places let me tell you. Sure the light may be smaller than an atom and as unclear as fleeting hope, but focused it is, like that of distant stars still shining light long after they fade bringing still warmth, quiet regrowth and unseen radiance to all they touch.

Anyway where am I, ah yes, escaping, which after those ten years I did finally throw off, though it cost me. Got a scar under my chin where my head almost was taken off, emotional shrapnel that still stings when it rains and probably always will, but I got out that first time. Yea first time, because what unfolded after that was the pathway to the next, and the next after that and the one after that. Each with a slightly different build from the last, yet not the same as before, the next with more original obstacles, more obscure clues and more challenging directions, but worth it everytime.

Worth it because with each break in the wall, each exodus from confinement, each doorway to the next, you find not that you left something behind, but the expanded limits of what holds you bound thus bringing you to where you can see more warmth, listen to the regrowth and touch the radiance in all we ever were or will choose to be.

So yes, it has not turned out exactly as I had imagined but to make a long story shot, I am still thinking about it though.

Thanks

Take Care

Just me.